We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize
