in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate