Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
