I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
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Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
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My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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