I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize
