I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Randomize
