Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
so let's talk penis.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Randomize
