He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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