Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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