If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
