chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
