i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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