someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
