This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize