Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Randomize
