The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
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It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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