She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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