Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize