I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
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