it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize