Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
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