what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
