i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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