As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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