My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Congratulations! We have a period
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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