Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Randomize
