I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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