If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
