Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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