So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
She's JV to your varsity
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize
