And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
