i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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