Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
There r osticjed everywhere
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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