A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
