Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Randomize
