I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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