I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize