Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
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I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."