her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
