I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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