Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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