Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
