The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
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while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
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We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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