no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Randomize
