were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
