Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
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