You're completely useless in the revolution.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
