Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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