Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
