Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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