I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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